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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2000-03-16 ... 15:22:23

There's not a whole lot going on right now so it's [true] story time!

If I were inclined to give titles, which I'm not, I would call this one "When Paradigms Collide" or something like that.

There used to be this woman who was a vice president or something at the publishing company I worked at. She made a ton of money, and boy was she mean. Typical stereotype of the ball-busting female executive, the stereotype that you thought went out in the 80s: helmet hair, stupid business suits, stupid bulldozer attitude. She was like the Margaret Thatcher of that company. Total evil asshole woman.

Anyway, the tampon machine on the floor where we worked was broken, or had been tampered with, and it always gave you 2 tampons AND your quarter back. We called it "The People's Revolutionary Tampon Machine." It was pretty cool.

One time I'm washing my hands at the sink when this woman marches in, sticks her quarter in the tampon machine, and of course gets 2 tampons and her quarter back. She's standing there looking kind of astonished, and I said (oh I don't know why I bother): "That's the People's Revolutionary Tampon Machine."

She looks at me, looks at the tampons in her hand, and goes, "Yeah, it's like I won the lottery."


That still cracks me up, how I could say something about revolution and in the very next breath she could compare it to the lottery. Well, everyone sees things differently.

I just smiled and left the bathroom. What can you do?

---m. smartypants


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