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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04


2001-12-29 ... 7:53 p.m.

It's my birthday and I'm full of maki rolls and Japanese beer. (Hey Angelbutt, join me in the perfect cheer: Go sushi, it's your birthday, etc.) What more could a girl ask for?

I may as well come clean and admit that I'm 30 years old today. Now all you teenage boys can quit fantasizing about me, I'm way too old for you. (Unless you're Amish. In that case please keep fantasizing, and give me your number. Oh wait, you wouldn't have a number, you're Amish. In that case just trot on over on your goddamn pony and let's get it on.) A lot of people get all freaked out about 30, but I think it's cool. For one thing, I can stop doing complicated math to figure out how old I am. (It all got to be one big blur there, past 25.)

High points of this past year: Going to India. Meeting People From the Internet. Making that subtle transition from a job to a career, and finally stepping up and owning my power (yeech, I sound like a self-help seminar) at work. Identity theft and the subsequent jailing of said thief. (Ha, ha, and again, ha. Crime doesn’t pay, beeeyatch!) I don't have any regrets, really, or any disappointments. Even the crap stuff eventually turns into a good drinking story. Tragedy plus time equals comedy and all that. La la la I'm Merry Fucking Sunshine.

New Year's Eve, again, is at my place. Again, we have so much liquor that even Dean Martin would be impressed. Again, the nameless faceless Internet "you" are welcome to come, but the same rules apply: send me an e-mail explaining how you are not a psycho killer or serial arsonist and persuading me that I should send you my real-life address and let you in my real-life house and you'll receive your invitation. Again, LT is already poring over his personal bible, the Mr Boston Bartender's Guide (he swears his personal motto is "What Would Mr Boston Do?") and getting ready to mix all manner of cocktails. We love to entertain, yes we do. I'm even planning to make little cucumber sandwiches. I love to make little cucumber sandwiches because then I get to buy Pepperidge Farm Very Thin Bread. I swear to god that's what it says on the package, Pepperidge Farm Very Thin Bread. It makes me smile.

Speaking of smiling, here are two funny poems.

And some amazing poetry from my high-school friend Aaron. Kiss him, love him, read his stuff, buy his book. You won't be disappointed, if you're the poetry sort.

---mimi "the poetry sort" smartypants

ps: happy birthday to me! You owe me a drink.

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