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the latest
waddle: good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03 elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01 building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19 ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09 my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04
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BANDED TOGETHER FROM REMOTE GALAXIES Through the magic of Netflix, Nora has been watching the Superfriends. In some ways, I can definitely recommend the Superfriends if you have a superhero-obsessed preschooler---the action is exciting without being scary, good always wins, no one ever gets seriously injured or killed, and there is very little weaponry and no "dark" themes like revenge or collateral damage to citizens. In other ways I cannot recommend the Superfriends, for instance if you value things like plot coherency, non-ludicrous situations, realistic-sounding dialogue, or media that does not contain the underlying premise that the goal of at least one of the villains is to transform all of humanity into apes. Nora could not care less about plot coherency as long as she gets to see Superman flying around and Wonder Woman kick ass, so Superfriends has been the #1 choice for TV time lately. Nora likes company while she watches, because otherwise who would be the audience for her homemade commentary track? I mostly read my book and try to tune out the Manichaean cosmology of the Superfriends, but I always make sure I have a notebook and pen handy. Because, wow. TOTALLY SERIOUS SUPERFRIENDS LINES These stairs may lead me out of this dismal pit! Quick, Robin! Use your Bat-Lube! Meanwhile, in orbit around the moon... We've got to get away from these hypnotized gorillas! There are only seconds before we reach critical mass and explode! There's nothing in this universe except for strange geometric objects! [grunting] Now...to take care of...the other head! [This one is from Nora, during an episode where Cheetah and Wonder Woman are pitted against each other for "the ultimate challenge"] [gleefully] Oh...this is going to be good! [Nora likes a superheroic lesbotronic catfight as much as the rest of us.] TIVO THOUGHT I WOULD LIKE THIS MOVIE, WHICH SCARES ME As for me, I just got done watching The Devil Wears Prada, albeit with much fast-forwarding. I think I must be getting old, because while Anne Hathaway is gorgeous and fun to look at (particularly pre-makeover), I found myself in near-total sympathy with the Meryl Streep character. Sure, her interpersonal skills could have used some work, but she deserved an assistant who truly wanted to be there---anything less is a huge waste of her time. The whole na�ve "Small Town Girl Makes Good In Big City Career" tone was irritating, as was the stupid soul-searching about whether a certain job fits with your sense of self. There were certainly plenty of reasons to leave that job, but "I don't like who I'm becoming" is kind of a strange one. Plus I was ready to throw something at the TV when the Andy character declines to meet the Important Editor in favor of going home to her boyfriend. If you have to be at a party for work, you have to be at a party for work, and you should just tell your boyfriend "sucks that I have to work on your birthday, let's celebrate tomorrow instead.� However, we all know I am a heinous ladder-climbing bitch, so grain of salt and all that. WHY DO I EAVESDROP IT JUST MAKES ME MAD Speaking of heinous bitchosity, I was ready to castrate and disembowel these two DePaul-hat-wearing Chads on the El, as they went into an EXTREME and MINUTELY DETAILED critique of various girls' appearances. Is she hot? She's pretty hot. Well, her body is hot, her face not so much. You're crazy, her face is totally hot. See, I used to think her face was hot, but one day I noticed that her lips are really thin and like one side is kind of higher than the other. Yeah, and did you see her last week when she had that huge zit? What about Other Girl? Oh shit dude, she's gotten so fat. She used to be hot but now she's a cow. She's got great tits though. Her hair is so busted, man, she needs to quit coloring it or something. AND ON AND ON AND ON until I shoved the headphones into my ears and tried not to bite my own tongue in half. I hate to break it to you morons, but it is not our job to live up to your standards of fuckability. Unless there is some magic potion that will turn you back into human beings, I hope you and all the rest of your brotherhood fall into a vat of pig shit and drown. Although I don't think pig shit is kept in vats. Why would it be? LITERARY LINK Ouch. But there is lots of truth there. ---mimi smartypants wants another vacation. |
