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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2001-05-25 ... 8:02 a.m.

Maybe this morning you ate some yogurt. Maybe you looked at the yogurt container and you thought, "Man, I wish this were bigger. I wish this yogurt container was 10 feet tall!" Although I can't personally enlarge your yogurt container (oh baby! that sounds naughty), I can show you a picture of a huge one.

Yup, that's me, and that's a huge container of yogurt, out in the middle of nowhere in the United Arab Emirates. During our trip 4 years ago, LT and I were driving around through the desert, seeing nothing but the occasional camel or nomadic goatherd and the amazing cinematic sand dunes, when suddenly out in the distance there was this giant yogurt container. Of course we stopped and took a picture. Wouldn't you?

Many people at work are not here this week, so I've been handling a lot of stuff and feeling super-competent and important. Which is rather nice, since modern life othen seems to conspire to make us feel inept and worthless.

Here's something Id like to do the next time I have to interview someone. I'd give them a normal interview and at the end of it say, "I'd also like to have you interview with the department god. Would that be okay? Good, I'll go summon him." Then I'd leave and come back wearing a giant paper-mache tiki monster head, and give another interview in a scary deep demon voice. If I could somehow make fire shoot out of the giant paper-mache tiki monster head, that would be good as well. I'd hire anyone who I couldn't make cry.

Speaking of fire, there was a tremendous house fire on my block last night. I'm reading on the couch and I hear all this screaming outside, not so much "help help" screaming as just yip yip screaming, and well, that's city life for you so I don't think much of it, but it intensifies and there's a lot of commotion so I finally look out the window, and just 2 doors down and across the street this house is on fire. I have never seen such giant flames in my life, this thing was ON FIRE, not just lots of smoke. The fire department came very quickly and put it out, and since it was early (9 pm) and no ambulance ever arrived I'm assuming (and hoping) everyone got out okay. I could smell the smoke even inside my house with the windows closed. My neighborhood is one of those lively multi-ethnic areas where everyone knows everyone else, so even after the trucks left and the board-up company had come and gone there was quite the little discussion group going on out on the street long into the night. Way too much excitement for a Thursday, if you ask me. (Did you ask me? I can't remember.)

----mimi "backdraft" smartypants


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