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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2002-03-13 ... 2:49 p.m.

Music terminology jokes. A bit of an over-reliance on puns, but hey, you try to come up with a humorous explanation of "pentatonic."

The Sun-Times has gone entirely too far with their weather words. Today when I checked the front page, screaming with its giant type from inside the vending box, the weather corner declared, "NO PARKAS." I take it we're supposed to infer that the weather is warm. NO PARKAS. Also: NO SPATS, NO GIRDLES, NO CODPIECES. NO GIRAFFES, NO MARTENSITE, NO PHLEBOTOMISTS. If the Sun-Times plans to start telling us What Is Not, they are going to become a very thick paper indeed.

Today after work I'm off to visit the Eyebrow Lady, and since she's located in such a fancypants Gold Coast area, and since I'm already indulging in a not-strictly-necessary service like having my eyebrows shaped and waxed, I'm going to further indulge in a taxicab up Lake Shore Drive to home, which means I get to look at the lake. I am a strange person, I know, but I am already looking forward to seeing the lake. I see entirely too little of the lake, seeing how it's right here in this damn city, all along its eastern edge. When it gets a little warmer maybe I'll schedule a Saturday full of Lake Looking. Somewhere near Belmont Harbor there's also a swingset that is angled such that, depending on which way you face, you appear to be either swinging out over the lake or over the oncoming Lake Shore Drive traffic. Said swingset was a favorite chill-out spot of mine in my younger, wilder, doing-drugs-outdoors days.

As much as I generally dislike shopping, there is something gratifying about consuming and then walking away with the goods. Now, in the so-called digital age, we wait and wait and wait for the mail. Currently I am waiting for some gift books (half my family has birthdays this month), and of course a few media things for myself (entirely too easy to do that, especially when it doesn't change the shipping price at all). Also, after reading a few rave reviews, I am eagerly anticipating the arrival of my toy movie camera. Intel is closing down their toy division, apparently, so for as long as supplies last you can order a toy movie camera for $30. Not $90, like they started out. THIRTY DOLLARS. So watch out, Chicago, because I'm coming to make a goofy little low-res movie of you. As soon as my package arrives.

"Do that thing with your hand again," I was asked today at lunch. But when requested to reproduce unconscious gestures in a conscious way, I just can't. Sorry.

Hey you! You look like the sort of person that would be interested in shrunken heads. Huh? Am I right or am I right?

A funny (old) article from Slate about buying term papers online. I was rather surprised at how expensive these "services" are! In college I needed every scrap of my cash for food and Substances and were it to come down to one sleepless night skimming a book, chain-smoking, and typing academic-sounding gibberish vs paying someone $50 for academic-sounding gibberish, I have no doubt which I would have chosen. Never mind the fact that I think the only time I saw $50 all in one place during my college years was on payday from one of my minimum-wage campus jobs. Anyway, enjoy the mentions David Foster Wallace, which is always a plus.

---mimi smartypants predicts it will all end in tears.


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