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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2001-08-16 ... 6:06 p.m.

Oh my goodness. Ay ay ay. (Or oi moi moi, if you prefer a Greek lament.) Work is trying to kill me. I've had so much to do this week, things like peeing and eating lunch have seemed like impossible pipe dreams. And that's not good. Bodily functions before business, that's my new rule.

Although, in a sick way, sometimes it's nice to have the horrific, crazy, everything-turns-to-shit-at-once days in order to appreciate the quiet, orderly days. Gotta have the rain to appreciate the sunshine, gotta have the Nestle's to appreciate the Godiva. If something wonderful happened every day, one would soon cease to appreciate it. It would no longer be special. Right?

(Note: I've floated this idea to LT, who basically agreed but came up with an exception. According to him, he could receive amazing oral sex every single day and he swears it would still be very special. But he may have some sort of agenda there.)

The manatee is just a nice animal. I think the manatee would make a great friend. He's gentle and loving, and enjoys quiet evenings at home. If you bother a manatee, you know what it does? It swims away. And if you continue to bother it? It swims farther away. If you've got nothing going on a Saturday night, your friend the manatee is always up for a good graze of the vegetation along the river bottom. When an argument breaks out at the party, the manatee is always right there going, Hey man. Let's not fight. Have another beer. Three cheers for the manatee! Hip hip! (This is the part where you say: Hooray!)

Did I mention I'm a bit stressed and over-caffeinated today?

I think there should be bumper stickers with odd sexual practices on them. For instance, I'D RATHER BE FELCHING or I'D RATHER BE TEABAGGING. I think that would be funny. This is a legitimate idea and I'm not just trolling for weird Google hits. No sir, not me.

---mistress mimi smartypants

ps: everyone go here and check out the picture of Gentry's beautiful boots. And Iím not even a Shoe Person.



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