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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2001-07-09 ... 11:06 a.m.

Sometimes e-mail spam can be unintentionally funny. For instance, I enjoy all-caps subject lines such as HOT HORNY SEX SLUT!!! Or they can be good for one's self-esteem, as in the ever-popular YOU'RE A WINNER!!! Why thank you, I am a winner.

This morning I was at a meeting where someone was having trouble talking, and he asked, "How can I put this into words?" I know it's just an expression, but it startled me, because I couldn't help thinking: You'd better be able to put it into words, buddy. They're all we have to work with. I'm with Wittgenstein on that one.

I did very little of note this weekend. There was an attempt to go to a play, which didn't work. (Who knew one would need reservations?) Beer was drunk. Floors were mopped. I used my newly acquired glue gun to work on my Brillo Project: 21 Brillo boxes (of the 10-count size) glued together into a giant rectangle and spray-shellacked. The visual repetition is very soothing.

Ever used a hot glue gun, by the way? It fucking rocks. I wandered the house in search of things I could glue to other things. I want to get a holster for it. Watch out sucka! I'm coming for ya with my hot glue Tek-9!

Someone just dropped by my desk and asked if I wanted to go out to lunch today, and I replied, "No, I have errands...I have to go to the post office." Only instead of saying post office, I said zoo. I'm trying to make that into a classically "Freudian" slip, but I can't come up with any sexual connections for either zoo or post office. Maybe under hypnosis I could. Anyone want to hypnotize me?

I don't think I want another gadget in my life, but I must admit I am intrigued by this TiVo device thing. Anyone use this? Has it improved your life or is it not all that? I don't watch all that much television, but when I do I am pretty specific about what I want to watch and I would love, love, LOVE to skip commercials. So if you have any strong opinions on this technology, feel free to write me. Heck, feel free to write me anyway...maybe I'll have more luck being witty/amusing/coherent in e-mail than I am on the Web. Besides, it's been too long since I've heard from you, you slacker.

---mimi "you never write, you never call" smartypants


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