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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04

2000-06-22 ... 18:59:42

This friend of mine is going through some sort of life crisis, and we had a talk today where he agonized about what his "goals" are. This prompted me to think about what my goals are. I don't think I have any. Well, I know I have goals, especially short-term "in the next year"-type ones, but longer-range than that I've not really clarified with myself. So here are some goals.

(1) To dig to the molten core of the earth.

(2) To walk through a revolving door on skis.

(3) To perfect my gangsta rap lingo.

(4) To work on having EXACTLY the lifestyle of Nora Charles (I realize that #3 and #4 may not be compatible).

#1 is the most important. I've gotta see that lava flow!

You thought this would be a serious entry? Get outta here!

We have a case report in this month's ophthalmology journal about a guy who was masturbating and holding his breath, when a particularly forceful...shall we say...culmination of said activity caused his retinas to detach.

His vision will never fully return.

Warn the folks in your office!

LT is in Boston this weekend, presenting a paper, so I shall live the glamorous bachelorette lifestyle, which mostly means cheese and crackers for dinner and staying up too late watching the TV and petting the cat.

One more thing. Whatever happened to the days when you could end an argument by huffily saying, "Good day, sir!"

longing for yesteryear,

---mimi smartypants


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