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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04


2001-04-10 ... 2:53 p.m.

Under the heading of "Things That, Unfortunately, I Can Never Forget" goes this ad copy for a sex toy catalog I once got in the mail....

"Can an anal plug be beautiful and functional at the same time? YES! if it's the blah blah blah Anal Plug...." [and so on]

Beautiful. Functional. Anal plug. The mind reels. Man, that's creepy like Bob Dole’s hand.

Speaking of creepy, I finally got around to cleaning out one of the hall closets this weekend (on my to-do list for months) and I found this bag/briefcase thing. It's black, a nice size but not huge, with a flap like a messenger bag. It's brand new, and has a tag (with the price cut off) from a store I never shop at, which makes me think it was a gift. But I can't for the life of me remember getting any sort of bag as a gift. Very mysterious.

But I've been looking for a new bag, and this mystery bag has all sorts of neat flaps and compartments and things, and is stylishly tasteful, and meets the requirement of being able to fit my Filofax and my wallet and a library book and yet not look ridiculous, so I transferred all my stuff to the new bag and have been carrying it around for a few days now. And that's all well and good, but it does bother me slightly that I have no idea where this bag came from. I was telling LT about the mystery, and he said, "Gee, I hope it's not some kind of cursed demon bag."

Great. Now I'm worried.

That would be GREAT diary material, though, if the cursed demon bag made me kill people and do all sorts of evil things. I'd have a lot more to write about then.

---m. smartypants

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