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the latest waddle:

good morning, wordpress - 10:36 a.m. , 2009-07-03

elaborate murder attempt - 2:56 p.m. , 2009-07-01

building a tractor in the basement - 10:42 a.m. , 2009-06-19

ask no questions tell just a few lies - 3:17 p.m. , 2009-06-09

my long lasting flavor really lasts long - 1:10 p.m. , 2009-06-04


2002-02-27 ... 2:56 p.m.

A THOUGHT (which may or may not be useful or true, you be the judge): All serious, "real" friendship is a tiny bit erotically charged. This comes through most clearly in grade school. I was never "popular" but was more the type to have one intense best friend: doing everything together, having sleepovers, engaging in elaborate, complicated playground games, writing 15-page letters whenever we were forced to be separated by things like summer camp. And if we ever got in a fight, there were dramatic scenes and tears and passionate apologies, just like lovers in some Italian opera.

Of course, you grow up and your friends become a bit more utilitarian: this is the girl I see punk bands with, this is the boy I can call on a weeknight for a beer, this is the girl who laughs at everything I say (always good for an ego boost), this is the colleague I can talk football with, this is the friend who will let me send a maudlin e-mail at 3 am and not tease me about it later. But think about it: with your very closest friends, isn't there still that little spark of attraction? You love the shape of her mouth, you love to watch her smoke, and she says such interesting things. He lets you make outrageous double entendres and naughty jokes, and it's safe because nothing romantic is going to happen between you. Having a close friend allows for non-goal-oriented flirting, which is good for the soul. THUS SPAKE MIMI SMARTYPANTS.

Today I've been nibbling all day, rather than eating proper meals, and I just realized I've been alternating the sweet and the salty: banana, rice cake, dried fruit, instant vegetarian "chicken" soup, oatmeal cookie, wheat thins. Who cares? Right. Moving on.

Many fun things you can do with liquid nitrogen.

For the person who has everything BUT minty freshness. Personally, I would be tempted to eat weird combinations of things and see if I could break it.

Poor LT got a ticket today. I think it may have been his first moving violation ever. The worst part is that he didn't realize his license had expired, and the cops took it. We are supposed to go to Madison this weekend to visit friends and drink wine etc, but him being licenseless presents a problem and I thought we would have to reschedule the road trip. Because he is a resourceful boy, though, LT called me at work with a plan to take the bus from O'Hare Airport: cheaper than you think and only three hours or so. I find it highly amusing that although I have a valid driver's license, it was never once suggested or mentioned that I could be the one to drive us to Madison. It's a simple fact: I can't drive, or rather I shouldn't drive (if you value your life). It probably didn't even cross LT's mind that my driving was an option. That man knows me well.

Remember when I found out that the male platypus was poisonous? That irritated me. I am 30 years old, I am a certain sort of person, and I feel like the poisonous platypus was something I should already have learned. What I need is some sort of Mimi Smartypants newswire, and then any interesting fact will automatically be forwarded.

In that vein, did you know about the pooping peasant in Spanish nativity scenes? Wow.

---mimi smartypants, alis volat propriis.

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